To Whom It May Concern,
I still remember when I met you. I had just met your mom. I didn't know where the two of us were going, and so I tried to keep my distance. Eventually, though that sweet little girl melted my heart. I remember wrestling on the floor with you. You acted like a tough little boy. When I got a little too rough, then the sweet little girl came out. It didn't take long for you to take up a permanent place in my heart. I love you. I will always love you.
I remember when you brought home a gingerbread house. I don't remember how, but I ended up crushing it. You were so upset with me. I was just as upset with myself. I didn't like seeing that I had upset you. I have spent the last several years building gingerbread houses with you. I have been trying to make up for the one that I destroyed. I suppose I have numerous years to keep working at that. I still have the one we made this year sitting on my counter. It is a reminder of the last time that I saw you. If you are interesting, it still looks pitiful. Apparently, it is not a good idea to by the kit on clearance, and hang on to it for an entire year.
I have always tried to treat you like my own flesh and blood. I guess at some point I dropped the ball. I remember several weeks before the world blew up, that you told me I only liked to do things with you when my kids were around. I was devastated. I felt like the emperor in his new clothes, naked and exposed. I want to make that right. You are my daughter. You will always be. No matter what happens, I will always be here. I came to you, and told you that we would start to do somethings just the two of us. Then all this happened.
I haven't been at my best. There are a lot of things that I could have done differently. I am trying to make right, what I have messed up. No matter what happens in the future, being your dad is something that I still really want to do. It makes me so angry that someone could have a child, and then turn their back on her. I don't want to do that to you. I don't know how or when we will come out of this, but I will be there for you. I will never turn my back on you. I could not live with myself if I were to do that. For the time being, these are the rules we have to live with. I am here. I will always be here, and I will always love you.